The Post Office

To all my friends who have taken the time to read my blog, to those who have taken the time to leave wonderful feedback and to my friends who have encouraged me in this endeavor: I want to give a great big heartfelt thank you to all of you. This blog, though short lived, has been fun and I have enjoyed sharing my life, my stories, my essays and photos with you. It was an experiment that took a bit of an unexpected turn for me. Originally I had not intended to use it as an outlet for so much writing. I love to write but there is no way I can keep up with a blog set up for short stories and essays. This will be my final entry. Once again I would like to thank all of you who have taken the time to read my rambling blog entries.

So, my final post:

As usual my mind has been focused on perspective or more accurately my lack of perspective. Those of you who know me personally will know that from time to time I have a bit of a physical issue I deal with. Nothing huge, insurmountable or even worthy of writing about. I do however let things get the best of me and I find myself frustrated at times. Recently I found myself, tired, frustrated and way out of perspective. As will often be the case however, life has a way of hitting me right between the eyes with a reality check.

I was pulling into the post office almost a week ago and due to the Christmas rush the parking lot was a little crowded. Not overly so but I wasn't feeling well and it was more crowded then I was in the mood to deal with. There was a parking space relatively close and I noticed there was a handicap parking space open. I would never park in a handicap parking space but there are times when I would love to be able to. I saw a car pulling into the handicap space and I did not immediately see a special placard in the car or see a special license plate entitling the driver to park there.

Now this is where I have a rambling flashback and need to give you some history. The year was, well the year was a long, long time ago and let’s just leave it at that. I was one of three cars pulling into a doctor’s office parking lot. The first car parked in the handicap parking space, the second car parked in a parking space quite a bit further from the entrance to the office. I parked just a little further out. The weather was very cold, there was slush coming down and there was a lot of ice on the parking lot.

Out of the handicap parked car bounds a young, apparently healthy man. He didn’t limp, walk slow or seem to have any trouble moving. I got out of my car and was slipping and sliding on the ice. I was in pain and at the time due to an injury and I was having a hard time walking. As I was walking to across the parking lot, the people in the second car had gotten out and were trying to negotiate the ice, wind and rain. Much to my dismay, sadness and outrage at the driver of the first car, the man and woman in the second car were about 75 years old or older. The man was feeble and had a hard time walking. The woman was not much better off and she was trying to support the man with her wiry little frame.

I hurried toward them to help them both but before I was able to get to them, the man slipped on the ice and the woman fell with him as she was trying to keep him up. My heart ripped in two as I saw them. They had struggled to their knees by the time I was able to help them. This was a small medical complex with about four different offices in it. The older couple and I were going to the same doctor so I helped them inside my doctor’s office and told the receptionist that they had both fallen. They ended up calling an ambulance for the man, I never found out if he was o.k.

I waited outside for the driver in the car that parked in the handicapped space to come out of his appointment. I yelled at him and cussed at him and finally grabbed him by the jacket and even though I was in pain, seriously contemplated throwing him down on the ice but thought better of it and just walked away. He probably thought I was crazy because he backed away and did not come after me. It was stupid on my part to get so out of control but I was so outraged at what happened to the two older people.

So with that in mind, back to my original story. As I parked I saw a car park in the only open handicap space available but it didn’t look like the car was legally entitled to be there. My son was with me and I almost grumbled about the person but thought better of it. The world around us often has more then enough bitterness in it and I try to be the last place on earth that my son hears bitterness from.

We got out of the car and started walking toward the door. Much to my dismay the person in the car seemed to be trying to get my attention. I knew I was in a bad mood and I really didn’t want to deal with this person but I knew I could not just ignore him. As I got closer I looked up at the person who had rolled his window down by this time. He had two letters in his hand and he was asking me if I could go mail them for him. He also had a cane, he was hooked up to an oxygen bottle and he appeared to be missing a leg.

I answered him with a very humble yes sir and took the letters. He was very relieved and started trying to explain why he was asking. He was afraid he had missed the outside mail pick up time and these were important letters for him. I told him it would absolutely be my pleasure and I told him I was happy I could do this for him. I felt like such a self centered, self pitying, idiot. My initial reaction to seeing the car pull into that space before I ever even saw the driver, sadly, spoke volumes about the state of my heart at that point.

I went into the post office and mailed the letters. My son who is generally a constant fixture at my side did not follow me when I went to check my post office box. When I retrieved my mail and turned around my son was walking over to me with a bounce in his step and a huge grin. He told me the reason he had not followed me was because he saw a “Grandma” carrying a lot of mail and she looked sad. That is how we describe elders, as Grandmas or Grandpas. He opened the door for her in hopes that it would help her and maker her happy. He said he wasn’t sure if it made her happy or not but he wanted to make people happy like I do.

On our way out of the post office the woman stopped us, she had waited for us to walk by and she told me what a kind son I have. She had a bright smile and she touched his face tenderly. His smile lit up like the sun and we both said thank you to her. I told him he had done a great job of making her happy and this thrilled him.

I got into the car and even though it was a rainy day I put my sun glasses on. I drove home with tears in my eyes. I had such bitterness in my heart at the onset of this entire incident. I had gotten frustrated and bitter with a person for no reason and hadn’t even met the person. Then I got an instant reality check when I saw the person needed help. Who am I to take myself so seriously and to focus on my own petty issues when people are in true need? Yet my son, with innocent eyes, wanted to be like me. As is often the case my son’s pure, sweet heart melted mine and put my own heart and mind into perspective.

Otter